i'm sorry

i try to be honest, but i can't.
i try to be smooth, but i can't.
i try to be perfect, of course i try, but i can't.

N N N

Napo meet up, JKT on begining february.. i love you Guys :)

thankyou :)

this is 2011. thanks God for your caring & for your loving. i love you God, yes i do.

for this begining year, I'm ON STRESS ! how come? of course from my final project. just 2weeks later my time, can i? sebenarnya gw udah pasrah bgt sama keadaan final project gw. bab 4 yg paling menyita wktu, tp malah bab itu yg belom jadi :(

tapi kl gw berhenti disini, apakabar usaha dan pengorbanan gw slama ini? jadi manusia kok lemah gini ya? kl emg ga tidur slama 2 minggu bisa menghasilkan bab 4, knp tidak gw lakukan? okee.. i'll try. yes, i am.

on processing final project, sometimes there so many angle that God send to accompanny me, to live my life :)

poltak caesarrio hutagaol, this man sometimes makes me scared about my future. trushty it, he's word sometimes killing me out. yes, it works. maybe, he's the angle that God have, his support makes me know how to serve myself when i'm on stress. thankyou krebipeti :) -and, i don't know for what reason our togetherness, but thankyou-

bagus prasojo, OH MY GOD, this is the real kindy mand that i ever had before. he's very helpfully. he's makes me to be me, he support me, he try to solve my problems, and ofcourse he always there beside me. i love you, gus :) be nice always.

pak mandala, how can i say so thankyou, sir? you're the really man that i ever know. you threat me as my own self. you always support me, your understanding makes me want to be my best self, and you're always be my friend indeed (;

and.. all of my napo. i love you so :)

this final project just i dedicated to all of you, and my lated man: my superhero daddy, finally it's finished. are you happy dad? and to my lovely mom, thanks for you. know how much i love you? ohh unspeable, mom :)

the lated man, 2 years

Maybe I'm going to anywhere in this entire world,

but for sure I'll never leave you..

-pa, aku ingat slalu kata2 ini, please always beside me. keep your promises on me truth (:-


i miss you so damn much daddy, it's over 2 years. how are you? how your day? are you happy? please tell me. will you meet me on my dream this nite? hopefully it.

new year :)

okay, new year use to be colorful, but i want to be neutral, so i choose to be black and white.


so here we go again the new year
New year, brand new you.
But dont meant that we have to change everything in our life, let we just leave the bad ones and keep the good ones. sounds so cliche, eh?


here are my 2011 resolutions, hope i can reach them all:)

Maroon 5 - Nothing Last Forever Lyrics

OH GOD, MAROON 5 will held concert at tenis indoor.. i want it, seriously :)

It is so easy to see
Dysfunction between you and me
We must free up these tired souls
Before the sadness kills us both

I tried and tried to let you know
I love you but I'm letting go
It may not last but I don't know
Just don't know

If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

A bed that's warm with memories
Can heal us temporarily
The misbehaving only makes
The ditch between us so damn deep

Built a wall around my heart
I’ll never let it fall apart
But strangely I wish secretly
It would fall down while I'm asleep


If you don't know
Then you can't care
And you show up
But you're not there
But I'm waiting
And you want to
Still afraid that I will desert you, babe

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Though we have not hit the ground
Doesn't mean we're not still falling,
Oh I want so bad to pick you up
But you're still too reluctant to accept my help
What a shame, I hope you find somewhere to place the blame
But until then the fact remains

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes you so hard to stay
Nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

Everyday
With every worthless word we get more far away
The distance between us makes it so hard to stay
But nothing lasts forever, but be honest babe
It hurts but it may be the only way

why you so ?

So i guess i have been missing for few days and I should get back to my blog. Days ago, I was sitting on my bed with my laptop and stumbled upon others' blogs. As the result, I've just realized that I miss to write and I miss this blog so much!And most importantly, i miss you..


Days are pretty hectic for me,especially when I'm about to leave and I have lists of things to be done. Not only packing seems so hard but also the weather seems unfriendly these days. Besides from the packing stress, I was completely in a horrible situation which is.. being sick,again. I know I have mentioned it often and I don't know if there is something wrong with my body or the weather. Oh well, but one injection from the doctor truly helps!